The Life Not My Own

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Pregnancy and My Body Image

My body has really changed since I got pregnant, and I know it’s only the beginning.  In some ways, it’s exciting.  I know that as my belly grows bigger, my baby boy is one step closer to being in my arms.  And what a miracle it is!  It’s amazing how my body knows exactly how to change and what to do to help this little one grow, and prepare me to bring him into this world!

I’ve been right-on-track with my weight gain, but so far most of it has gone to my hips and belly.  My face and my arms show no signs of the pregnancy…except for the lovely acne that has made me feel 15 all over again.  Woo-hoo for pregnancy hormones!  But still, some of the changes can be a bit shocking.  I’m having a hard time getting my pants to fit, even with a belly band, simply because my hips have gotten a bit wider.  I feel a bit self-conscious going anywhere because my usual shirts are no longer long enough and no longer “covering” enough on top.  Last night I even noticed my first stretch marks.

And then there’s this huge belly that gets bigger every day.  Because I’m tall, baby is spread out a little bit on my torso, but I still feel huge.  Turning over at night has become a definite chore, and I’ve even (gasp) began to waddle a little bit.  My husband still thinks I’m beautiful and attractive, and tells me often, but there are days that I really don’t feel that way.

Just this morning I came across something I had written near the end of last summer.  I wasn’t pregnant, but my sister was, as well as a lot of my friends and acquaintances.  I remember them complaining about how they looked and being very surprised.  To me, they looked beautiful.  As I read my own words, written not so very long ago, I realized that they could have been written for me, right here and now.  This is what I wrote:

“I have never experienced the joy of being pregnant. I hope to someday, but not as yet. Meanwhile, I watch many dear friends of ours, and even my own sister, enter that new and exciting time of life.

I would just like to take the time to tell each and everyone of them that I think they are never more beautiful than when they carry a little one (or little ones!) in their belly. Fat? Ugly? Lost figure? Far be it that they ever think so of themselves!

Pregnant women radiate such a joy and beauty that no one else can. They sacrifice their comfort and their life to nourish and protect the little one within their womb. They endure morning sickness, cravings, new clothes, being uncomfortable, and so much more for their babes. And yet, they radiate the essence of beauty.
So, to all the women who have been pregnant, are pregnant, or hope someday to be pregnant, I thank you. Never forget how beautiful you are!”

What a timely reminder at this season of my life!  Next week I’m planning on taking a couple of shopping excursions to get some maternity clothes (as of right now, I have one maternity sun dress and a be-band…that’s it).  My goal?  To embrace this wonderful season of life, and cherish this time with my son growing within my womb.  I don’t want to look frumpy or like I’m hiding.  I want to look beautiful, and celebrate getting to wear maternity clothes.

My husband thinks I’m just as beautiful as ever…so why can’t I dress that way?

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2 Comments:

  • At March 22, 2012 at 2:29 PM , Blogger Charissa Steyn said...

    I am 14 weeks along already and find myself wanting to actually wear shirts that accentuate my little bulging belly ;) I think being pregnant is sooooo amazing, definitely filled with tough parts, but the pregnancy seems to be going by sooooo fast!

     
  • At March 26, 2012 at 1:36 PM , Blogger Caitlin said...

    I can totally relate! I'm really excited because this week I'm FINALLY big enough to go maternity clothes shopping!

     

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